They Stood Up and Clapped

It was Christmas time 1980 and I was in high school. I was in the eleventh grade. We were on our Christmas vacation and when I went back to school I was told by my teacher that I was going to be moved up to the twelfth grade for the rest of the year because I was in school for too many years. That year we got a new principal. The one that we had retired. When he came, we were wondering what he was going to be like. I had met him the summer before because I took summer school and I was on the summer school newspaper and we had to interview him. I and some of my classmates got the assignment and he seemed really nice. One day there was a meeting for me in school. My teacher, Mrs. H, and my social worker and some people from the home that I was living in were there. At this meeting they said that I would have to move after I was done with school. When they told me that, I was scared and they told me that REM was going to buy a home in Bemidji. The social worker would come sometime to talk to me. I told them that I wished that there was a day program in Roseau so I did not have to move and she said they had a good program in Bemidji.

One day I was told that I was going to have to move after I was done with school. I had already been thinking about moving so the program director for the home said that REM in Roseau was going to buy a home in Bemidji. The program director said that maybe I could go look at the home. So we talked about it and later that spring I went and looked at the home and some others.

There was a group that met every week for bible study and I was a part of it. I also had a friend who took me to it. We had gone to the bible study for a couple of years. About the last time before I moved, my friend and I went out for a pop.

There was a lady that worked at the home. Her son also went to the bible study too. One night before I moved, I went over to her place for supper and I had a good time. I met her son in school and we began to be good friends.

Later that spring, before I graduated, Mom and Ann, a friend of ours, took me to Bemidji. The reason why we went was so I could look at the home and the workshop. When I went to the workshop, I got to meet Jeff. He was the one that ran the workshop. When we got to Bemidji, there was a lady that came and took me to the workshop for a meeting. When I was at the meeting, I was told about the workshop and what the rules were. They also gave me a little book to read that told more about the shop.

After we were done, the lady brought me back to meet Mom and Ann. We were going to stay overnight there and go back the next day.

After supper, we went to the group home. When we got there, Mike and Sarah were there, and Sarah talked to us and told me what time they eat and what time was bed. They also showed us the room that I would have. I asked if the program director was there. Sarah said that he was gone for the day. I told her that I was hoping to see him. Mom told me that there would be another time that I would be able to see him.

The next day we went back to Roseau. As we were on the way, we were talking about when I would be moving to Bemidji. It was about time for our prom in Roseau. There was a worker that worked at the home. I asked her if she would go to the prom with me. She said she would if it worked out. One day she had to go out of town so it did not work out. One of the other workers took me to the prom. When I went to the prom, I went up and sat in a seat and I saw some of the girls that were in my grade and for just a moment I wished that I did not have this disability so maybe some girl would have gone with me.

Before the day of the prom, I went in the gym and saw them fixing the room up for the prom. My teacher told me that I could go down and watch them setting up for the prom until it was time for me to catch the bus to go home.

The last couple weeks of school I practiced walking up to the stage. Then the big day came that I was going to graduate. That day I walked to the school. Then when I went to get my diploma everyone stood up and clapped for me. There was another student that came up to help me get my diploma. As I was going and leaving the school, it was hard for me to leave because I started to think about all the people and all the friends that I met through the years. It was hard for me to go because I knew that it would probably be the last time that I would be able to see them.

That day was one of the biggest days of my life. For many years I have dreamed of that day and then when everyone started clapping for me as I was going up to get my diploma I was so happy. It was one of the happiest moments of my life. After graduation, my social worker took me out for a pop and we talked about me moving to Bemidji. I had a roommate from a couple years ago and I got to know his Mom and Dad. I asked them before if they could come up but they said they could not come, but when I was getting ready for graduation I saw them and I told them that I thought that they could not come. They said that it worked out so they could come up for my graduation. One of the workers was having a party for her because she also was graduating too, so I got to go there. The party was at the worker's house and there were a lot of people that came to the party and her family was there too.

One day the social worker that I had in Roseau took me to the group home in Bemidji for a visit. I stayed overnight at the group home. When I got there, they took my suitcase up to the room that I was going to stay in. As I was unpacking, I started to think about the people at home and it made me feel sad. I did not want to move, but I knew that the time was going to come when I would have to decide what home that I was going to move to.

After the people came home from work, I got to know more of them. Later that night before we went to bed we had a snack. It was warm that night and they had the window and door open. After we got done with the snack, everyone said goodnight. After we were in bed, I could hear some of the other people talking. I was laying in bed thinking about what I was going to do the next day and what it was going to be like living in the home. The next morning after I got done eating, I went and got everything done. Then I went and sat in the living room and I watched as the other people got ready for work. The city bus came and picked everyone up and took them to work. I remember that it was a really nice day out and the sun was shining. After the people went to work, the people that worked in the office came to work and I got to meet them.

Some of the men wore overalls because they were working in the wood shop. As I was sitting there, I was wondering if this was the home that I should move to and I wanted to see what it was like living in the group home.

Bob was the one that was program director for the home in town and out in the country. When he came to work, he asked me how the night went. I told him it was good. He said that he was not going to work all day because he was going to get married that weekend, but he said that if there's any problems that came up to call him. I told him good luck.

The social worker said that she would come back for me that Friday. I waited for her all day. I could not wait to get back home because I missed my friends.

I was still there when the people came home from work. Greg was going home for the weekend so Al said that if I could not go home until the next day, I could stay in Greg's room. I was hoping that my ride would come so I could go back to Roseau. On the way back we talked about the group home.

At that time it was around the Fourth of July and one of the workers said that if I could have stayed for another night, I could have maybe gone to the water carnival.

After I graduated, I asked the program director in Roseau if I could stay at the home until after the fair week. He told me that I could. So the last couple of weeks before I was going to move to my new home, I went to see some of my friends for the last time before I moved.

I had a little job that I did every morning. I would pick up the mail for the home and I would bring it back to the home.

That spring that I was going to move there, there was a baseball strike going on. Everyone was talking about this strike and when the strike would be over and that was the first baseball strike that I ever remember.

After school was out some of us from the home went camping. We stayed in a tent the first night. It was hard for me to sleep because the tent was really dark. Then in the morning I told the man that stayed in the tent with us.

That day we played games and we did other things too. There was a man that came to the camp and I knew him from before because he lived at the home in Roseau when I was real little.

There was one of the camp counselors that said that we could paint her so some of the campers did. Then that night, before we went to bed, we played outside. The next day we went home and that night at the supper table I was wondering what it was going to be like in my new home.

I went over to Mom's house a lot the last month. In some ways it was hard for me to go, but in other ways I wanted to go because I lived in Roseau all my life and I wanted to try something new.

The home was going to have a rummage sale, and they were going to sell some of the old cribs. One of the cleaning ladies went over to a little house next door. I told that I would go and help so she said OK. We worked for most of the day and sometimes I would stop and the thought would come to me that before too long this was not going to be my home anymore, and in some ways it was hard and I would start to get sad. Then I would tell myself that it will be good to move and have a new home.

Sometimes in the evening I would go out to the playground. I would think about what it was going to be like in the new home and if I will be able to come back to visit and in some ways I wished that I did not have this handicap.

Sometimes I would go and talk to my friends about it. They told me that it would be OK. I saw another friend of mine and he had to leave home too. I prayed about it and I knew that God would be with me.

Sometimes when it was nice out, we would eat outside. We got a grill that they could cook on. The staff would cook hot dogs and hamburgers and it was good. We had the picnic in the playground and it was fun.

One day the O.T. therapist took me home with her overnight and I had my first taste of beer. Later that night her roommate came home and she brought some of her friends too, but they did not stay long. Then in the morning I went back to the home for breakfast. Then later that day I went to see Mom.

Well, before I knew it, it was the week of the fair. I went a couple of times. One of the times was the last night that I was living in Roseau and it was the last night of the fair. I stayed at home for most of the day getting everything packed then that night Mom and I went out for supper at the fair. Then after we got done eating, I went and told all of my friends goodbye. Then Mom and I got on the bus and I went home.

That night was one of the hardest nights of my life telling Mom goodbye and knowing that the next day I was going to leave home. If it was not for Jesus, I don't think I could have done it.

When I came back from the fair, the other kids were already in bed and it was really hot that night and it looked like we would get a thunderstorm that night because it was so hot. When I went to bed that night, I could not believe that it was my last night. I was sad but I didn't want to show it.

That night before I went to bed I prayed. I asked Jesus to go with me. There was an old church that was across the street from the home and some of us from the home went to school there in that old church for a couple of years. They tore it down and they moved the house the week that I moved. In a way it was hard to see that go because it brought back a lot of memories. It also seemed like my whole world was changing and I did not know if I was ready for it.

The next morning I got up and got ready to go. I was scared of what it was going to be like in the new home. After we got all of my things in the van, I told everyone goodbye and just before we took off one of the girls that lived at the home came out and told me goodbye. There were three workers that worked at the home that moved me.

Pedie Pederson

Living Like A Winner